Convergence

Online Dating Advice For the Brethren

Clarissa Rodney, the lead character in my upcoming film "Something Worth Waiting For" just posted some fun tips for online dating for those brothers in Christ who might be trying to find that special someone in cyberspace. See what she has to say here.

Also, don't forget we're still looking for your help with the making of the trailer for the movie. Whatever you can give would be greatly appreciated--whether its $10, $25, $50 or $100! Consider making a donation today by clicking here. Thank you for your support!

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Weekend Recap!

Well I had these intentions on doing a weekend recap but so much has happened just in the past few days that I don't know if I'll be able to get it all in!

For starters, I do want to mention that I go to one of the greatest churches in the world! Some of you may remember this post that I wrote about feeling disconnected from Buckhead Church. Well, apparently the staff at BC is at least attentive enough to read their members blogs from time to time. After writing that post I got an email from Annette Daly and Angie Weaver, the church's Production Coordinator, inviting me to lunch on Thursday. It was a wonderful time because they didn't condemn me for what I said in the post, but rather we tried to come up with solutions for the problem. As I said in my post, I wasn't trying to slam BC, it was just an issue that I've been going through. And nothing would make me happier than to just find a solution to that issue. At any rate, this is something that I've always appreciated about Buckhead Church. As large as they are, the staff takes time to do little things to show their volunteers that they are appreciated. Whether its birthday cards, thank you cards, even providing breakfast in the morning when we serve in the AM, and dinner when we serve in the PM, even though we don't volunteer to get praise from man, it's just nice to know that someone cares...

Thursday night was quite a shocker with learning on the passing of Michael Jackson. I'm still kind of in disbelief at times. But you know, none of us are going to live forever. Even Michael Jackson. I'll do more of a tribute to him in another post, I think the King of Pop at least deserves that.

The rest of the weekend was nice--Thursday was also Shari's birthday. I went down to Stockbridge and we all went to Longhorn. I spent the night down there and Friday we went to a waterpark in Decatur with the kids. Friday night was girls night and I brought Zharya here to the house to spend the night with me and Khalilah. We had a lot of fun! So much so that Khalilah and I actually missed her after she left!

Saturday night Shari and I went to see my girl Anita Baker in concert at Chastain. What an adventure!! Chastain is an outdoor theater and it RAINED that night.  But me and Shari sat right there to listen to the Lady of Soul and it was so worth it!! Ms. Baker sounded AMAZING, she looked AMAZING, and she has not changed one bit throughout the years. Her hair is still the same, her smile is still the same, her style is still the same, her voice is still the same, which just goes to show that she is a class act. Timeless. It was a great night.

Last night was church and Fusion, which was ok. Came home and watched the BET Awards, and what a hot mess! I came in on the last half of it but I thought they were going to do a tribute to Michael Jackson but what I saw was hardly a tribute to anyone. Watching the show really confirmed for me once again that I'm really getting old. I love hip hop but this stuff they're calling hip hop these days is just ridiculous. I just can't understand. This world is going downhill.

Well, we are still raising money for the movie "Something Worth Waiting For." Please do us a favor and make a donation today so that we can get this trailer made! The link is over on the right. God bless!

Need Your Help!

Hey what's up Convergence readers! You've heard me talk about it in previous posts but the Something Worth Waiting For website is finally live and kicking! In case you didn't get the memo, Something Worth Waiting For is my latest film that deals with the issues a young television producer faces while trying to maintain her purity in a crazy, modern, hyper-sexed world.

If you are single and you're reading this, please go to the site and take the survey on Singleness and God. We're trying to get feedback for the film and for future blog posts on the website. If you're not single, please still support the film by forwarding it on to people you know, by praying for us and by giving to our cause! We believe this is a movie that everyone will enjoy and we need EVERYONE's help to get this movie made.  We need each other!!!

Here's the link again... www.somethingworthwaitingfor.com.

Here's Lookin' At You, 2009

So yesterday was Father's Day. It was also the first day of summer, which also means that we are halfway through the year 2009. This reminded me of this post that I wrote at the beginning of '09, and I figured now would be a good of a time as any to evaluate how this year is going so far.

On the surface, I would say that 2009 is not going so well so far. I just broke up with Jon for the second time. We broke up once in February. He broke up with me that time. Said we should take 2 months off and see where we go from there. We reconnected after 2 months and tried to be just friends. It's very difficult to be strictly friends with someone that you've been with for a year and a half. Needless to say, I didn't feel like it was working so I broke it off last week. I feel HORRIBLE about it mainly because it really didn't go down the way I planned. He was really hurt and I don't like hurting people. I also feel bad because I feel like once again my point was a little misunderstood. I really wish we could have remained friends and talked it through but I think I may have completely alienated him and made him never want to speak to me ever again. How do these things happen? It's like you have in your mind how the whole thing should happen and then one text, one phone call just makes things take a turn for the worst...

Work is stressing me out. There's lots of turmoil, unrest and confusion going on. We were told back in late March/ early April that some of us would be laid off but as of today, June 22, we still don't know who. So all of us at work have been living in this state of uncertainty for the past 3 months and it's causing all of us a lot of anxiety and stress.

And well, I told you about my problems with church.

So all of these issues have been stressing me out so much that I haven't really had a chance to enjoy 2009 yet. I'm really hoping that the 2nd half of 2009 gets much better...

On the same token, as I look at my post from January, I do see that a few of my goals that I set out with have indeed actually been met. I've been doing a little better at posting pictures on my Facebook. I've kinda gotten back into the filmmaker scene. As a matter of fact, my film "Defining Moments" is screening at the Black Women's Film Festival tonight at the Woodruff Arts Center at 7 pm so that's exciting. They had a whole weekend of panels and events that I went to which was also cool.

 I also finished writing my screenplay "Something Worth Waiting For." Not only did I finish writing it but I found a producer for it and we are actually moving toward making the film in summer 2010. This is probably the biggest highlight of my year so far. We just launched the website for the film - www.somethingworthwaitingfor.com. We've also started a Facebook page for the movie and we've already gotten a ton of fans! We'll be shooting a trailer for the film in September and will soon launch our fundraising campaign to help with production costs. So check out the website, become a fan! Just as much as it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a village to make a movie too!

So as far as 2009 goals, I still have some other areas I need to work on--like working out...Ay-yi-yi...I've got a long way to go in that area...

My Very First V-Log!

My Church Dilemma - Part 2 (and maybe 3)

So I just realized that I never posted the second part of my church dilemma. Partically because Part 2 of my dilemma is a little convoluted, but I'll try and make you understand...

* As much as I love Buckhead Church, I'm starting to feel less connected there than I have in the past. The other week when I went to my first Fusion of the summer cycle, I remember walking through the door and thinking to myself "Wow, things sure have changed." Meaning, I've been going to BC for four years and I don't see any familiar faces anymore. All of the friends I made at past Fusions have either moved away or gone away to join the ranks of Marriage-dom. It's the same thing with Production. The production team has grown so much that I rarely get scheduled with the people I knew from way back when, and when I meet new people, it's rare that I get scheduled with them again. When I first started going to BC I could at least recognize faces. I used to stay at church for hours after it was over, just fellowshipping and having fun with friends.

But now I feel like one in a sea of faces and I come to church and then I leave and go home. And the thing about it is I'm very much involved in the church. I'm not a pew-sitter. I go to Fusion. And for some reason I just don't really feel like I"m connecting with my Fusion grouop. I'm in a small group. And my new small group is nice but it's nowhere near the level of relationship I experienced in my last small group. I do production. And I've already explained the problem with that. I used to also volunteer in the front office when we were at the grocery store so I knew practically all the staff. But now the staff isn't even the same, and many of the ones who are vets don't seem to remember me. It's very frustrating but I don't know if I should take this as a sign that I'm growing apart from BC or is it that I just need to keep trying to find my "crew" again? It's just very frustrating to be so invovled in a church where I used to feel like family and now I feel like a stranger. And I LOVE Buckhead Church! I don't want to leave! Hopefully the problem is that I just have to find my people again.

* My other church dilemma just has to do with the church as a whole. I'm still frustrated with the church and the direction we're taking. I've been on this rant before but I started to feel this way as I was sitting in that United Methodist church a couple weeks ago. The church is struggling, they're not really meeting their weekly offering goals, which made me think what happens to smaller churches like these? Are they supposed to just get eaten up by large ministries that have all the lights and smoke? I've seen many small churches try to solve this problem by mimicking what they see in larger churches--in other words, being something that they're not. I get a little aggrevated when I hear people from other churches putting Buckhead Church on a pedestal and trying to replicate everything we do. I believe Buckhead Church works because it is carrying out the mission that God has for Buckhead Church. God might have a totally different mission for your church.

A Brief Memo to Avril Lavigne

June 6, 2009

Dear Avril:

I really like your sense of style and your songs. Especially your older stuff like "Sk8ter Boi" and "Complicated." Boy do they rock at the karaoke bar. But you're making my life "complicated" by stealing my name. You see, I've had this name for 34 years, but now everytime I introduce myself people feel the need to say "Oh, like the singer?" Um, noooo....My name is AY-vril pronounced with a long A, emphasis on the AY. It's really annoying because I never introduce myself with a short A. But they still don't listen and continue to call me by your name.

Furthermore, you're totally messing up my google search. Now whenever I google myself, my company website doesn't come up, my IMDB page doesn't come up, but links like "Avril Speaks Out On the Environment" come up instead and it's you, all about you talking about trees. As a result, I have been forced to change my movie moniker to Avril Z. Speaks so that the differentiation can be made between Avril the singer and Avril the filmmaker. From what I can tell, things have gotten a little better on the google front with that name revision. But of course now everytime someone writes about you and Jay-Z in the same article, my listings go further and further into the abyss of search engine-dom.

From now on I'm going to need you to rightfully only refer to yourself as Mrs. Whibley. That should clear up all complications in this matter.

Thank you,

Avril (pronounced AY-vril, not A-vril)

My Church Dilemma - Part 1

Some of you may know this about me but I stopped listening to gospel music about 3-4 years ago. Cold turkey. This may come as a shock to others of you that know me because I used to be the gospel music queen. If you needed a CD or needed to know the name of a gospel artist, I was the first person to call. Well, I got to a point where I just got tired of it. All the songs started to sound the same. A lot of the lyrics weren't really saying anything that touched my soul. They felt predictable. I could turn the radio on and listen to a song I had never heard before and by the end of the first verse I could completely sing along, riffs and all. So I stopped listening to gospel and started listening to more Christian radio. This wasn't a far stretch for me, I've always liked this kind of music anyway so it was a natural switch. Then I started going to Buckhead Church and it furthered this switch because they never played gospel music. And all was right with the world. Until I stopped listening to Christian radio too for mostly the same reasons. The lyrics weren't as predictable but they did start to sound the same. And a little cheezy at times.

Well, fast forward to now, 4 years later and one day I realized that I didn't know any current gospel songs or artists, not to mention I found myself missing the sound of gospel and missing the movement and the soul of choirs and that type of worship. So what did I do? I turned on the gospel station. And what did I find? Well, that in the last 4 years, there hasn't really been a change of gospel artists. The same artists are still making music and the stations are still playing a lot of the same songs that they did 4 years ago. But it's all good. It's rekindled my love for gospel music and made me appreciate once again the soulful sounds of the genre.

Which brings me to my church dilemma. I guess because I've been listening to all this gospel music, lately I've been really desiring to hear a choir, to be around some soul, to get back to my "ruuts" (that's roots for those of you who don't read deep Southern slang :-). I don't want to leave Buckhead Church, I just want someplace I can go to hear some live gospel sounds. So I've been looking for some churches I could visit to get this experience. But then I get reminded of the 2-3 hour long services, the obsessions over appearance, the preacher hoopin' and the hollerin', all the announcement reading...and then I decide to pass. See, BC has spoiled me. I've gotten used to short services now and messages that get to the point without dragging things out forever and a day.

So yesterday I called myself trying to find a happy medium. I visited a local United Methodist church. I knew that it would be more traditional but hey, I grew up AME so how different could it be? I had heard of UM churches being a little stuffy but I went to their website and found out that they had a black woman pastor who taught at Spelman and a choir and I just thought maybe this could be the best of both worlds. Maybe she would bring just enough soul to the traditional church where things wouldn't drag on but the choir would be soulful and lively. Boy was I wrong!! There were about 4 people on the choir, so I didn't get that soulful experience I was looking for. But the service was fairly enjoyable. The message was good and the people were nice. If it wasn't for the fact that it smelled like mildew in there I would probably go back.

But I didn't accomplish my goal of finding a soulful church that I could visit outside of BC. I probably should've gone with my first instinct which was to go to Ray of Hope in Decatur. But again, I started thinking about all the other stuff that would probably come with going to a church like that and decided against it. Maybe next week I'll suck it up and go to ROH...

So that's Part 1 of my church dilemma. I want to hear some soul. But I don't want to leave Buckhead Church. I just want to hear some soul every now and then. It's probably wishful thinking to find a church with a lively choir and where services only last 1 - 1 1/2 hours. If anybody has any leads, let me know. I'll have to let you know about Part 2 of my church dilemma later 'cuz I gotta go get ready for work. Stay tuned!

Tired

I'm just tired, ya'll.

- I'm tired of the people upstairs making so much noise.
- I'm tired of never having enough money to do the things I really want to do.
- I'm tired of feeling like my work is not good enough.
- I'm tired of all the uncertainty on my current job.
- I'm tired of trying to figure out how much longer I even want to stay at my current job.
- I'm tired of people complaining all the time.
- I'm tired of waiting for things to jump off with my film "Something Worth Waiting For."
- I'm tired of working for other people.
- I'm tired of being single.
- I'm tired of not having a church to go to when I want to hear some good gospel music.
- I'm tired of my own excuses.
- I'm just tired of it all...

Sometimes I wish I had it in me to be a bitchy person. You know, that person who says what's on their mind and doesn't care what people think? I wish I could be that woman. But my momma taught me better than that. She taught me to respect others and to be kind. And I think my dad taught me how to be logical, rational, and level-headed--even in the midst of anger. And while all those things help me to be a productive citizen, they don't help me very much when it comes to getting things off my chest.